LIV -South Beach
So this isn't so much a post about a workout, or the gym at all. It's about the opposite of a workout: Destroyign yourself with alcohol. And only in Miami does a gym charge $35 for a class, and thank its members with a 90 minute open bar at one of the top clubs in the world. Yep. When I went to barry's on Tuesday I noticed they had a poster for their 2 year anniversary party that Friday. At LIV. With 90 minutes of free drinks from 10-11:30.
Never one to miss a chance to go to LIV for free, and drink for even freer, you bet your ass I hit this up. It didn't hurt that the party was for Barry's, aka the gym of choice for girls in South Beach who have no verifiable source of income.
Of course I got there before 10, because no minute at an open bar should ever be wasted. the club was empty for a while, and just me and my boy Mike were there drinking free Wodka and soda. But then Miami's entire fitness community walked in. I wasn't at the bar five minutes, and Aubrew, my SoulCycle instructor, came up and said hello. In the sea of well-toned bodies I also managed to meet the manager of FlyWheel and Fly Barre, who of invited me in for a class when I told her what I was doing.
Also ran into about a half-dozen people I know, who all suggested other crazy classes I should try. The point is, holy fuck. Going to the gym in Miami is clearly not about health at all, as every single "fit" person in the city was here destroying their livers for the night. This shouldn't come as much of a surprise to anyone, I'll add. Maybe we all just work out like crazy so we can justify drinking at a club for 4-5 hours at a time.
I lasted until about 2, then went to Bodega and undid every workout of the week with a plate of tacos and some tortilla chips. Wise move I'm sure. I was home by 3:30 and woke up at noon. So fuck you to all you revisionist history assholes who say stuff like "I can't party late like I used to." yes you can, it just takes some planning. And, apparently, a whole lot of women's fitness classes